Peripheral Vision
There was a time when I would have told you I am more spiritual than religious. This is still, and probably will always be, true. I am not an enormous fan of organized religion - but I am a believer in the presence of God. However, there are times when I lose touch with my own faith, getting caught up in the day to day duties of life. But last night, I happened to walk outside and glance up at the night sky, and it startled me out of my apathy.
All too often, I find myself looking downwards, lost in my own thoughts and reflections. And last night, in the moment I looked up and my vision cleared, I remembered what I'd been missing.
The air was clear, with a breathtaking array of stars scattered across the dark canvas of night. Whether it was the result of my glasses prescription being two years old, or a trick of the light, they seemed to twinkle, sparkle, and shine. If I focused on one particular star, I would see the barest hint of another near by. But as soon as I tried to find it, it was gone. And yet, I knew that if I didn't try so hard, I'd find it again, on the edge of my vision.
That's as apt a description of my faith as anything else. I KNOW that God is there, but the more I seek to find him/her, the more difficult it becomes. But if I focus on what I DO know, on the things I am sure of, trusting in the presence of God - well, I am never disappointed.
Faith is believing, even (and especially) in the absence of proof. But seeking (in this context) is to search for reassurance of our faith - endeavoring to discover God's presence in our world. And much like the explorers of the past - for today, at least, the stars are my compass, helping me to find my bearings.
4 Comments:
How very enlightening, Heather.
If you travel wayyyyy back in my blog you will find a post where I was full of doubt and anger spiritually. I feel like the well wishes and prayers from many of my blogger friends actually had something to do with me feeling the need to really find my dad. I found him and I have never felt more spiritual.
Oh yeah.. "the stars at night, are big and bright...deep in the heart"
Thank you for a lovely post!
Cathy, sometimes I think the image of "God the father" is a double-edged sword. I think as human beings, our relationship to God can be all tied up in our relationship with our parents, for better of for worse.
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Enjoyed a lot! »
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